nerves

It’s Monday evening. Chris drove home this morning, after we picked up bagels for our separate homes (geez…). After Chris left, I drove straight to the office to see what it would be like during a weekday during rush hour. It wasn’t too busy; probably a silver-lining symptom of COVID. I filled up my car with gas, got groceries, and updated our family finances spreadsheet. In between all of that, I also did a live Peloton ride and FaceTimed with Kyrsten.

After all of the busyness was behind me, around the mid-afternoon, I started to feel so strange. I know it’s mostly nervousness about the new job and all of the unknowns that come with that. My imposter syndrome is acute right now. I’m trying to remind myself of that cliche that no one knows what they are doing and everyone is winging it. But on top of that, I’m really homesick. I’ve traveled for work a lot over the last decade and spent a lot of time alone, but this feels different. For one, I have to get used to the idea that this could be our new city soon, assuming my new job works out and Chris is still game to move here. I’m also sure that since I went from spending 99% of every waking hour with Kyrsten (or Kyrsten and Chris) to being completely alone has a lot to do with the ennui.

I’m trying very, very, VERY hard not to let negative feelings take over right now. I’m definitely not letting myself wonder if I’m doing the right thing. If I made the right decision. I’m trying to remind myself constantly that we only regret the risks we don’t take; the adventures we don’t go on. No matter what happens, I need to make this an adventure.

Thanks for listening, void.

View from my bike.

first night and I’m kinda freaking out

We got on the road to Montreal this morning right on time (despite forgetting our face masks and having to return home). Other than that, and accidentally breaking the cup holders off the Peloton when loading it into the truck, the start of the journey and the drive to Montreal was very smooth.

Then, we arrived at my new home. I’m not going to say that everything went south because nothing really went wrong, thankfully. But things could have been better. The security person in the lobby was pretty gruff, though he was mostly helpful, so I shouldn’t complain too much. Unloading the truck was annoying because we had to do it from the busy street, so we always needed someone to stay with it. It was a struggle to find the parking lot and in the end, Chris worried about taking the truck in, fearing that it would be too tall. We did walk through the parking lot though, to find my spot and I was annoyed to learn that I have to walk up a flight of stairs before I can take the elevator to my floor, which will make any sort of shopping a pain. I also realized while unpacking that I need a lot of storage solutions to wrangle my small items and I also need power solutions (power banks and extension cords). On top of all of this, I’m generally freaking out that I have to go to work on Tuesday … I’m feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

It’s 8:30 pm on Saturday evening and I’m actually wondering when I can go to bed. I hope tomorrow I will feel less freaked out and homesick. Maybe after I get groceries and some niceties to make the place feel more like home and less like a hotel, I’ll feel much better. And hopefully Monday I can relax and maybe even venture out on my own a little bit before (OH MY GOD) starting my new job as a CFO on Tuesday.

Enjoy some photos!

On the road!

Holy crap, I live here now.

After some mega unpacking.

Image

moving (sorta)

Wow. Looking back at the last post of this oft-neglected blog, I see that about this time last year, Chris and I spent a weekend in Montreal. In that post, I gushed about how much I love Montreal, and how every time I visit, I want to re-learn French and revamp my closet to try to be stylish.

Fast forward to a few short months after that post: the world went under lockdown for COVID-19 and my job at the company I’ve been with for 15 years basically disappeared. And the reason I started this post with “wow”: I left my job and accepted a (big) position at at a company in Montreal and I am moving (sorta). Tomorrow, in fact.

What I do I mean by sorta? Well, very generously, my new employer is allowing me a trial period during which they are renting me an apartment and leasing me a car so that I can live and work in Montreal Monday to Friday. So for the next twelve months, I’ll be living in Montreal, returning to Hamilton on the weekends. This way we don’t have to full-on move and Chris doesn’t have to quit his job until we know that the new job is working out. Fingers crossed!

So I wanted to restart this blog to try to document this crazy new adventure. I’m going to attempt a daily entry here, with photos! Souhaite moi bonne chance! Both with the new job, the new city, the new language, and this blog promise!

Stuff I’m taking to Montreal.